I must be completely mad. That is the only
possible explanation for my actions, somehow or another I have been
completely taken over by insanity. Or something else, someone else
controlling me.
Why else would I have done such a thing? Of course, I knew what to
expect at the ritual. I've witnessed them before, although not like
that. -Never- like that. The other times I was sent to witness, I
was just that, a witness. I watched the Rite and that was all.
I didn't intend what happened...no that's not quite true. I've
wanted it to happen, thought about it, but I would have never
approached you, you are far too important to me, my Padawan, to lose
on a whim of sexual desire. I may lose you yet to just that after
this evening is over. After you've had a chance to think without
passion clouding your senses.
It's just...it was just...-you- were just...beautiful. The very
moment you pushed back your hood and I saw your face outlined in
fireshine, I was lost. No, my beautiful one, I was lost the moment I
first saw you, I just didn't know it, refused to believe it. I
watched you grow from a gawky, unsure adolescent to a confident
young man. And now, tonight, in a sea of tumultuous emotions and
passions that run freely, I could no longer resist. And I damned the
consequences that I know will come and touched you.
I should have stopped, but I didn't. I wanted to feel your passion
rise with those around us, I wanted to hear you cry out in your
pleasure, I just wanted to -touch- you, even for a far too short
moment.
I should have stopped it afterward. I could have easily passed it
off as part of the Rite, let the barriers of Master and Padawan
reassert themselves before too much damage was done. I almost did,
almost let it go at that and I would have kept that precious memory
of your beauty in a secret part of my being, held close to my heart
where its heat could have warmed me were I trapped in a Hothian
glacier.
I should have stopped it. But I didn't. The moment the words left my
lips, the moment I started to brush the entire incident aside like a
cobweb, I looked in your eyes and saw a part of you die. A little
flame that had just begun to burn was extinguished without a word of
protest. Once, long ago when you were still a child and I had
refused you as my Padawan yet again, I saw that very same look in
your eyes, your hopes and dreams disappearing, ripped from you by
words from my lips.
And this time, I couldn't let those frail dreams die.
So again, I must plead insanity, because why else would I take your
hand now that the ritual is over and lead you away. Others in our
group are pairing off as well; the night is far from over and an
aura of sexuality hangs heavily in the air.
I don't look at you. I can't or I will lose what little nerve I have
left and this evening will end very quickly in disappointment on
both sides. We walk over the low hills of the field, you trailing
behind me without protest although I can hear the questions you
aren't asking, the same questions I saw in your eyes earlier. I say
nothing; I can't answer because I don't -know- the answer. I just
know that tonight I want this, need this.
I stop abruptly and you stumble into me. Before you can recover I've
swept you into my embrace, my lips on yours, as I had wanted them to
be during the Rite. We are barely out of sight of the others but
that seems to matter so little here, with you in my arms.
I pull back, releasing your lips, and for just a moment I hesitate,
my conscience, my sense of propriety waging a battle within me
against my desire, my -need-. But before the outcome is decided, you
make your own decision and I find myself pinned to the ground
beneath you. I can feel pebbles and twigs poking into my back but
even this is ignored at the feel of you against me.
We kiss, lash at each other with tongue and teeth and, just this one
time, I allow your loss of control. How can I berate you when I am
lost as well? Your mouth is far sweeter than I could ever have
dreamed, the taste is intoxicating and I could have kissed you all
night if other treasures hadn't beckoned to me.
I break this kiss, ignoring your protest and jerk your tunic aside,
the seams straining. I bite your newly exposed shoulder, hard, and
you gasp in pain, your hands moving to my head and digging into my
scalp. I lave your abused skin with my tongue, feeling the tiny
dents made by my teeth. Grabbing underneath your arms I hoist you
higher, pulling you over me. I press my face against your still
clothed stomach, cupping my hands around your ass to pull you higher
still until I can feel the heat of your erection against my cheek.
Your pants are still damp from your earlier climax and I can smell
the bitter salt of your ejaculation, more heady and arousing than
any resins burned in the earlier ritual. This is the incense of our
rite and I savor it, press my lips to the dampness and the hardness
of your cock. You give a choked gasp above me. Your hands have long
since left my head, resting instead on the ground as you struggle to
keep your balance.
I kiss you, bite the shaft gently through the layers of fabric
between us and the gasp turns into a near sob. You struggle away
from me and I let you go, no matter my wants and needs but you have
only moved to strip away your clothes, with the speed and grace that
comes from being a Jedi. My clothing is quickly sacrificed as well
and we both hiss at the contact of naked skin.
You are like a wild thing against me, capturing my lips in a
bruising kiss before you sink lower, taking my throbbing shaft
between your lips with not even the barest hesitation. The wet heat
surrounding my cock forces a choked cry of pleasure from me and my
hands scrabble at your head, trying to pull you away. You ignore my
almost inarticulate pleas, pushing my hands away with your own and
pinning them to the ground.
Helpless now, trapped by your grasp and the bolts of pleasure that
arc through me, I arch into the tight suction of your mouth, my
climax is coming far too quickly and I am powerless to stop it. Just
as I would have been overcome you release me and this time my cries
are from frustration, my pleas are for you to continue.
You slither back up my body and kiss me hungrily, my taste on your
lips. You capture my straining cock in your hand, gripping tightly
and pumping hard and it is too much, it is enough. The planet tilts
and I fall off the edge, coming hard, spurting my seed over your
hand and onto my stomach.
Panting harshly, I barely notice you moving to kneel between my
legs. My eyes snap open, however, at the brush of slick fingers
against my anus. You catch my startled eyes with your own, again
asking questions, but this is one that I can answer and I do, with a
slight nod. Your fingers, still wet with my semen, press gently into
my body, opening me, readying me and I force my already relaxed
muscles to loosen more, to accept. One finger, then two, carefully
probing, lubricating and I press against them impatiently, all doubt
washed away by a flood of need.
Even without words you understand, spreading and lifting my legs
further and now I feel the wet tip of your cock against my entrance.
You hesitate, for just a moment, then press inward.
No words can describe what I felt at that moment, the sensation of
completeness I felt as you filled me with yourself. I dimly hear you
groan through the fog of ecstasy that surrounds me, feel my cock
thickening and lifting yet again and aren't we doing well for a man
of my age, to be able yet a third time this night.
You sink inside me easily and it seems that it will never end, that
you will just push deeper and deeper within me but finally it is
completed and we are still, both gasping heavily for air, breathing
in the heady scent of sweat and sex. My hands twine into your hair
and I pull you down, devouring you with my lips, hard enough to
bruise but you respond with equal roughness.
You tear your lips from mine, your hands moving to grip my hips and
with a smooth movement you pull back until you nearly leave me
completely before slowly surging back in, hard. With precision and
control that at this moment I envy, you repeat the movement again.
And again until I am nearly sobbing, begging for more, for faster,
for anything to ease this ache inside me.
You ignore my cries, keeping an even rhythm of slow, careful thrusts
until I feel as if my body is aflame. Your long braid tickles my
stomach with your every movement and I can feel sweat dripping from
your face onto my chest as your breathing harshens. Your thrusts are
finally coming with some speed, some force as your hard-won control
slips and you are pounding into me, driving harder and faster as the
pinnacle approaches.
The Force opens up around us, the heat and sensuality that is
sweeping over the planet this night is like a red haze, flowing
through us, between us and it is like a flash fire through already
singed nerves.
One unsteady thrust, two and then you ignite, dragging me into the
flames with you and we both scream hoarsely, helplessly, as we are
consumed in a blaze of passion and ecstasy like none I have ever
felt before and that I do not believe I could ever withstand again.
Your knees fold under you and you slide, boneless, into my arms,
slipping from my body as you collapse. You press your face against
mine and I am not surprised to feel wetness there, although I could
not say if they are your tears or mine that are dampening our skin.
Perhaps both. I think it is not a strange reaction to nearly being
consumed in flames.
I can only pray to gods that I am unsure exist that we will not be
burned in worse ways by this encounter and only time will tell. Time
and perhaps the Council.
I banish those thoughts from my mind, savoring instead the moment,
the heavy warmth of bliss that surrounds us. I trail a hand over the
silky skin of your back, soothing the last tremors away. As you
drift into exhausted sleep I use a touch of the Force to I cover us
both with our cloaks, forming a cocoon from the chill of the night
and uncertainty of the future.
-finis-
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