"Bailing Bail"
Rating: NC-17
Bail gets in trouble and asks Obi-Wan for help.
"Oh, hi," his caller stammered. "Um, I hope I haven't caught you at a bad time?"
Obi-Wan blinked as he recognized the voice. "Your Highness?"
"Did I wake you up?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact," Obi-Wan growled, glancing at his chrono. "It's three o'clock in the morning."
"Is it?" Bail sounded genuinely surprised.
"Yes. Aren't you on Coruscant?"
"I am, but I lost track of time."
Obi-Wan grumbled in irritation, rubbing at his eyes with the heel of his hand. He was in no mood to humor the prince at such an obscene hour. "Unless this is important, your Highness, I'm going to go back to bed."
"Actually... well, in fact there is something I want to discuss with you."
Obi-Wan stifled a sigh. Now was not the time for any kind of "discussion." If the prince was going to call him at this hour, he could at least be quick about whatever it was he wanted. "What is it?" Obi-Wan ground out.
"I wondered if I might ask an enormous favor of you. I know it's an imposition, but really it would mean so much to me."
Only years of etiquette training kept Obi-Wan from shutting off his commlink without another word. "A favor?" he mocked.
"Yes. Um, you see, something has happened and... well, I find myself in need of bail."
"Bail?" Obi-Wan echoed in confusion, wondering if the prince was referring to Bail Antilles.
"Bail as in: I've been arrested."
Suddenly Obi-Wan was wide awake. "Arrested? What happened?"
"Ah... traffic violation. I was driving outside the prescribed lanes of traffic."
Obi-Wan's brow furrowed as he contemplated this for a moment. "And you were arrested for this?"
"You have to understand, I was in my friend's Turbo XS-90," Bail offered, as if this fact should explain everything.
Obi-Wan shook his head. "I'm not following you."
"Well, when the police came up behind us, my friends seemed to think we could outrun them."
Things were beginning to make horrible sense. "And you followed their advice."
"Somehow it seemed like a terribly clever idea at the time," Bail said, sounding only mildly apologetic. "It was quite a grand chase before they finally caught us."
"I fail to see how leading the police on a high-speed chase could ever seem like a clever idea," remarked Obi-Wan.
"Usually I would agree with you," Bail concurred, "but in this particular instance, our judgment was impaired."
Obi-Wan doubted he really wanted to know, but he had to ask. "How?"
"Well, technically speaking, we were all under the influence of alcohol. Although I would like to point out that my BAC level was just barely at the minimum amount to be considered legally intoxicated. The others were far more drunk than I. That's why I was driving."
Obi-Wan fought the urge to throw his commlink out the window. Instead, he ground out, "I see. So you were arrested for drunk driving."
"Oh, no, not for that!" Bail hastily protested.
"No?" Obi-Wan asked in disbelief.
"No, no, not at all. In fact, I think they might even have let us go with just a ticket, despite the speeder chase. The Turbo XS has a diplomatic registry, what with Piat being the son of the Devaronian ambassador. Politics has its privileges, you know."
Or its abuses, Obi-Wan mused sourly. "Then why did they arrest you?"
"It's quite fascinating, really. Did you know you can be arrested for insulting a police officer?"
Somehow despite all he had heard so far, Obi-Wan still managed to be shocked by this news. "You insulted a police officer?"
"I don't know that it's standard procedure for them to make an arrest for such an offense," Bail explained, as if such minor points of law were the real issue. "But in this case I think it was sort of the straw that broke the eopie's back."
Not to be deterred, Obi-wan repeated more forcefully, "You insulted a police officer?"
"Ah, yes. I'm afraid I did." At least Bail finally had the decency to sound sheepish about it.
Obi-Wan groaned and buried his head in his hands. "What did you say?"
A brief pause. "Oh, well, that doesn't really matter now, does it? It was a terrible, terrible thing to do, and I was completely out of line. I suppose they were quite right to arrest me, when you think about it."
"I'll say they were right to arrest you!" Obi-Wan shouted. "You were driving outside authorized traffic lanes while intoxicated. You led the police on a speeder chase and then insulted an officer. They certainly ought to arrest you!"
Was it even possible for silence to sound embarrassed? Somehow Bail managed to accomplish such a feat. "Yes. Yes, I rather see your point."
"And what about your friends?" Obi-Wan inquired.
"Two of them were allowed to go. They hadn't actually done anything. But Piat and I were arrested. He insulted the officer, too, and he was quite drunk."
"So both of you are in prison."
"Oh, no. Piat left already. He was able to make bail."
Obi-Wan's brain was starting to hurt with the effort of trying to keep up with this story. "And you can't?"
"Ah, well, no. You see, I don't have my wallet with me."
"Why not?"
"Well, when the police stopped us, they refused at first to believe I was a senator. I'm afraid I took issue with their skepticism, and when they demanded to see my ID, I... threw my wallet over the side of the landing pad."
Obi-Wan's head was really starting to pound, and he hadn't even started beating it against the wall yet. "It just gets worse and worse."
"Actually, I believe that about covers it," Bail confessed with an awkward laugh. "Then again, I might have forgotten something. It was a rather long night."
"Why don't you just call your office staff to bail you out?"
"That is an excellent idea, and normally that's exactly what I would do, but...." He hesitated.
"But what?" Obi-Wan prompted savagely, quite beyond all patience.
"But... well, I just feel that right now...." Bail faltered, and Obi- Wan could hear him gulp hard. "Right now, I could rather use a friend."
The prince sounded suddenly vulnerable, and despite his better judgment, Obi-Wan could feel himself softening. He managed to sound harsh, however. "I ought to just let you stay in prison overnight, after all that. It might do you some good."
"You're probably right," Bail agreed, his voice timid and small. "A good lesson, indeed. You'd be quite right to. Only...."
"Only what?"
Bail's voice grew even smaller. "Only I... I would so like to go home. It's been rather a difficult night." He sounded as if he might begin to cry.
Obi-Wan cursed silently before surrendering to the inevitable. "All right, I suppose you have probably learned your lesson well enough. I'll come get you. How much is your bail?"
"50,000 credits. I know it's a lot, but as soon as you get me out, you can take me to a bank and I'll pay you back right away."
Obi-Wan sighed, "I have to get my master's credit chip. It'll take a little while. And you need to tell me what station you're at...."
"I really can't thank you enough, Obi-Wan," Bail said.
"Oh," Obi-Wan looked askance at him, "do try."
Flustered, Bail lowered his eyes. "Yes. Just so."
A cab settled onto the pad in front of them, and Obi-Wan ushered Bail into the vehicle.
"There's a bank nearby; we can stop to get your money," Bail offered.
"Don't worry about it. We'll get it tomorrow." Obi-Wan leaned forward to the driver. "Terani Tower, please, 75th level." He settled back into his seat, glancing over at Bail. The prince was looking out the window at the nightscape. "Are you all right?"
"Yes. I'm fine, all things considered." He fidgeted, twisting a lock of hair around his finger. "I do thank you, Obi-Wan. I'm eternally grateful to you."
Obi-Wan studied him a moment. "I'm glad to help. Just don't make a habit of it."
Bail looked abashed. "Of course not. I suppose you've never done anything like this before?"
"No," was Obi-Wan's succinct reply.
"No, I don't imagine you have," Bail said.
Obi-Wan sighed. "If you were all drunk, why didn't you just get a cab?"
Shocked, Bail protested, "We couldn't just leave Piat's Turbo XS in some garage!"
"Where is it now?"
Bail awkwardly cleared his throat. The thought evidently hadn't occurred to him. "I expect it's been impounded."
"It's so much safer now, isn't it?" was Obi-Wan's sarcastic retort.
Defeated, Bail turned back to the window. "See? I knew it was right to call you. If I had called one of my other friends, they would have found all this very funny. I knew you'd instill the proper guilt in me." He snorted. "You're my conscience."
"I don't want to be your conscience, Bail," Obi-Wan said softly. "I'd rather just be your friend."
There was a very long silence, and then Bail sniffed. In the darkness of the cab, Obi-Wan couldn't see if the prince was crying. His face still to the window, Bail said, "A true friend is nice right now."
They didn't speak for the rest of the short trip. The silence was occasionally broken by a yawn from the prince, and Obi-Wan wondered if he might have drifted off to sleep, but when they arrived at their destination, Bail immediately sat up. When Obi-Wan exited the cab, Bail turned to him in surprise. "You don't have to come up," he offered.
"Would you rather I didn't?"
Bail just shook his head. Obi-Wan paid the cabbie and led Bail into the building. Their silence continued as they rode the elevator to Bail's floor, Bail's yawns coming more frequently, and Obi-Wan surreptitiously watched as the prince's eyelids began to droop. He took Bail's arm to steady him as they walked down the hall. At the apartment, Bail coded the door and turned to Obi-Wan with a look of inquiry.
"I thought I'd make sure you get safely to bed," Obi-Wan answered. "I'll even stay, if you want me to."
Bail's expression eased. "I would really appreciate that."
"I may not have ever been arrested for drunk driving or insulting a police officer," Obi-Wan explained, "but I have done stupid things on occasion. I was quite a bit younger than you are now, but then," he favored Bail with a wicked grin, "Jedi do mature faster than other people."
At last Bail's face lit in a tentative smile. "I swear I've learned my lesson."
Obi-Wan draped his arm around Bail's shoulders as he led him into the bedroom. "Don't make your promises to me, your Highness. I don't really care. Let's just try to get some sleep before morning arrives."
They undressed and slid under the covers, Bail rolling into Obi-Wan's arms. Obi-Wan closed his eyes and yawned, burrowing under the covers, when a hand grasped his penis and began to stroke him. His eyes shot open, and he warned, "Bail...," but the prince paid him no mind, pressing his face into Obi-Wan's neck as he continued to fondle Obi-Wan with an expert touch.
Obi-Wan squirmed against Bail. "Aren't you tired?" he asked. "It's 4:30!"
"Mmm...tired," Bail mumbled, his breath moist against Obi-Wan's neck. He shifted his hips, bringing their erections into contact, squeezing them together in his hand.
"Bail...," Obi-Wan tried again, but it was useless. Despite his fatigue, his body responded to Bail's touch. The prince hooked his leg over Obi-Wan's hip, pulling him even closer, and Obi-Wan rocked against him, his fingers digging into the smooth muscles of Bail's back, his breath coming in harsh gasps. For several sharp moments they clung together, Bail's hand working them both. Obi-Wan squeezed his eyes shut, groaning as he came, even as he felt a warm splash across his stomach.
He held on to the prince, his breathing slowly evening out. They hadn't been together often enough for sex to have become routine between them, and it still surprised Obi-Wan how strongly he reacted to the prince's touch, how quickly he came, how intense the orgasm was.
When he had calmed down a bit, he raised his head. "Bail?" he inquired softly, but the prince was already asleep.
Obi-Wan rolled over onto his back, pulling the prince with him. Bail snuggled deeper into his arms but did not waken. They would be sticky in the morning - a morning which would come all too soon - but Obi-Wan scarcely minded. He closed his eyes, resting his cheek against Bail's curly head, and within moments was fast asleep.
~ fin ~